Art of Listening. Listening is a true art, I mean really listening to another person. Are you hearing what is said beyond the words? What is the true context? Is there a mask, such as self pity, that is the true context? How to be more present to really listen to those we are engaging with? How do we partner with another to really hear what they are expressing? When we are truly listening the person feels supported and respected.
One of the keys to really hearing someone is to be fully present. Being present is not always easy. Our mind wanders to focus on our own thoughts even if it is to think about what we will say in response. We are distracted and look away loosing the eye contact. Maybe this topic seems out of context or it takes our thoughts into another stream of thought. One of my teachers said that the average person is only present 6% of the time. Imagine how often all of us loose presence if we are only really present 6% out of 94% of the time we are listening.
The key to presence is practice, being mindful and pulling yourself back to presence every time you catch yourself not being present. A meditation practice or mindfulness practice is how we can hone our skill for being present more than 6% of the time and having the full capacity to really listen to another and hear them fully. Being more present is truly a discipline. Like anything we want to improve in our lives, practice is key to building a stronger pattern when we are working on a new pattern of behavior. Just as learning a new sport takes practice, so does being more present or mindful. It’s truly a skill worth learning.
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