I recently tested for my Second Degree Black Belt in Kyuki-Do, a mixed Martial Art style created from a Korean lineage. The test was both a stretch and a challenge and I was successful due to the support of my entire Martial Arts Community. The testing panel was very impressive with multiple members of the Kyuki-Do Federation present, including Grand Master Kim, a 10^th Degree Black Belt a 7^th degree Master, two 6^th degree Masters, and one 4^th degree Black Belt.

I have practiced Martial Arts at the AKF Black Belt School since 2006. In the beginning my participation in Martial Arts was like eating my vegetables; I practiced to meet a requirement for my spiritual studies. Overtime, I found that the practice taught me about focus and discipline that kept me moving along to the next step and the next step through my personal commitment to consistently attend class. When I became a Blue Belt, I was ready to quit. I had met the requirement that brought me to the practice. Master Tim Mullis, my teacher, asked me if I was to swim across the lake, would I stop in the middle or would I keep swimming to reach the other side? The answer was obvious so I kept swimming all the way to 2011, at age 51, when I tested for my first degree Black Belt.

Once I attained my first degree Black Belt, I was again ready to quit but I didn’t feel complete. I had been awarded the belt level but I didn’t feel like a black belt on the inside with integration into my practice. It was then that Master Mullis told me that Black belt is not a destination but the beginning of a martial arts practice; like a portal that you step through to start the real learning. So I kept swimming to the next shore.

During the final days of my preparations for my second degree Black Belt test, I was feeling the nervousness start to build. I practiced many hours to “perfect” my skills. I wanted to really shine during my test. I wanted to be powerful and flawless. I wanted to show up stronger in the space than I ever had. Then my reality of the true nature of “testing and challenge” hit and I saw the real opportunity for myself was to show up with poise. Mistakes can happen and nervousness can impact my skills related to the confrontation of a testing and challenge situation. Ultimately, I saw that my opportunity was to be fully present in the space and that if mistakes should happen that I would not get ruffled but would keep going without missing a beat. That at this level, showing up with poise and holding presence was the best demonstration of my evolution as a martial artist that I could hold.

On the day, I was nervous. I remembered my intent to be present with poise no matter what happened during my testing challenge in front of the testing panel. Mistakes did happen, I kept going, I held my space and completed the belt test successfully demonstrating the variety of mixed martial art skills that I have been training in. What I carry forward from my test is the intent that when I’m in an environment where I may be nervous about performing or speaking in front of a group, that no matter what, my unbending intent will be to hold my space and to present myself with poise. That is how I will shine and give my best. The true victory I gained was how I can cross train this testing and challenge experience into other arenas where I can harness my poise to hold my space with presence. This is how I will walk my years of Martial Arts training off the mat and into my life.