Breaking Through Your Balk: Finding Empowerment When You Engage Your Obstacles

What new opportunities or big obstacles are causing you to slam on your breaks? What mountain summit is your gaze fixed on? What are you balking at in your life? Feeling stuck, looking at it, ruminating about it and doing everything to avoid engaging with it.

Whenever you are faced by something that stops you in your tracks and you are feeling paralyzed by your resistance you may be balking.

Balking: from dictionary.com
verb (used without object)

1. to stop, as at an obstacle, and refuse to proceed or to do something specified (usually followed by at): He balked at making the speech.
2. (of a horse, mule, etc.) to stop short and stubbornly refuse to go on.

I’ve been finding myself balking at what life is bringing me frequently these days. I used to feel it as resistance but now I recognize it as balking energy that brings me to a screeching halt on any action.

Facing the unknown and not knowing how or where to start can cause you to go beyond hesitation and into avoidance. Energetically it brings up memories of my trail riding days in the Rockies, whenever my horse came to a dead stop at a particularly large log across the trail or standing on the edge of a steep riverbank before being coaxed to cross through the slippery river rocks.

Here is a simple process to move through the obstacles that you feel stuck in. You will feel empowered and experience an increase of self-worth and empowerment on the other side of what you are avoiding and balking at.

1. First take a few breaths to center yourself and notice what is stopping you at the edge of that new arena where you may lack experience or skills. Using your breath to intentionally stop the internal voices that create the steady stream of excuses that fuels your doubt.
2. Next be willing to spend some time exploring the arena without executing steps to directly engage it. The role of inquisitive exploring is an essential step to gain more knowledge about what you don’t know. Metaphorically poke a stick at it.

• Explore on the internet by reading articles and watching videos.
• Have a conversation with someone who does have the prerequisite knowledge and skills on the subject.
• What inner strengths do you have that can be cross trained into this arena?

1. Use your resources and support system. Who do you know who can share on the topic? Find someone with even a smidge more experience than you in this unknown arena and make a clear request for guidance. Be receptive to hear what they share.
2. This is the most decisive step. Now you get to shed the old skin of trying to look good so you can appear like you have it all together. Silence the internal voice’s whining “I don’t know how to do this.” Be an empty cup that is ready to be filled with new knowledge as you learn something new.
3. Now take what you learned and dive back in with your curiosity to see how it all works now that you have more knowledge. Apply what you learned to make the unknown knowable. Self-empowerment comes when you apply a new skill or accomplish something you have never done before. Cross train these new skills into other related arenas and build on your confidence as you engage with it. This is the understanding step where you apply what you now know and no longer feel blocked by it.
4. Your curiosity and imagination support you to gain new wisdom as you find your way to the other side of the obstacle that you were avoiding.